To the slew of fetishists the blog title is bound to drag in from google: no, this is not about fucking actual eyeballs. Try a tenga egg.
For those that don’t follow me on twitter, I unfortunately found out on Wednesday that my original eye surgery on New Years Day hasn’t fully “taken” as it was supposed to, and I’m going to have to go in for another, more invasive surgery called a vitrectomy. I’m not scared, the doctors that are seeing to me are all excellent surgeons, but the whole ordeal has made me consider how much of my body I take for granted.
As it stands, I have a black shadow over about a quarter of the vision in my right eye, among other problems. I see the world in a dream-like half fuzziness, an effect that would be almost nice if it weren’t for the constant nausea and headaches – imagine seeing the blair witch project with half a pair of 3D glasses and you have a general idea of my worldview.
However, I’m not writing this to bitch about my health problems – folks have it far worse, and in fact an old friend is waiting on a cancer biopsy as I type. I’m writing this to beg all of you out there – if you have a black spot in your vision, don’t wait. Go to the doctor’s immediately. I put mine off a week, and what might have been a $2000, 15 minute laser surgery ended up escalating to what now stands to be three major surgeries, $100k of medical bills, and what will be almost a year to full recovery. It’s just not worth it – a retinal specialist costs maybe $200 for an office visit, and that’s a hell of a lot more affordable than the mess I’m trudging through. Please take care of yourselves, take care of your eyes – step away from the computer every few hours and give your eyes a break. This craziness has taught me to value the vision I have, and to understand that sight is something I should be grateful for, not take for granted.